i haven't felt this vulnerable in a while.
it hit me like a brick. it's brimming the surface and it's going to come up all at once.
i will panic, become anxious, try to surpress everything by giving my self little talks of "stop being a wimp", and not be able to hold back my tears.
i feel like something inside me is going to burst.
what the hell have i been haboring?
it feels like a water balloon of tumultous feelings.
my lungs fill up and i deflate with one breath.
i have been walking around as if i didn't care for months.
it goes through the thought process and under the carpet.
and now it's too much.
i don't even know how to control it.
11:36 p.m. - 2002-07-08
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